Dreaming of Freedom

Well I’ve been working, sorting out our new flat and wearing my new rain clothes and all of a sudden the week has flown by. On Friday evening I braved the rain for the Critical Mass but sadly the rain had put everyone else off and it was a no-show, no-go sort of event.

I have finished reading Doctor Glas by Hjalmar Söderberg for the bookclub - which I think counts as my first Swedish book excepting Pippi Longstocking.
It’s an interesting read because Söderberg invites us to question the morality of anti-abortion legislation, martial rape, divorce, eugenics, the concept of duty, and the hypocrisy of 19th Century Western laws, social norms and expectations.
The main character is deeply conventional until he lets his feelings for another human being control his actions. The main story is about about love/lust/passion and the emotions and actions attendant to it. But I think it is also about feeling an affinity with someone in a society where the norm is a feeling of isolation and disconnection.
The Doctor who has spent his life ostensibly in the service of people, feels that he has never had the chance to ‘act’, that society forces him to stick to a code of behaviour that he feels no ownership of. He has no particular interest in helping people and has always refused to perform illegal abortions, although he often feels he should. This reluctance to act outside of the law changes when he meets the wife of a clergy man. Mr Gregorius is popular with his congregation but disliked by his young and recently unfaithful wife. To Doctor Glass, Mrs Gregorius is a ‘beautiful little insect with shimmering golden wings caught in a web’ in a ‘world of flies and spiders’ and she alone has made him want to ‘tear the web to pieces and kill the spider, if need be, for I do not believe it is forbidden to kill spiders’. The book asks us to question whether murder can be considered ethical or the lesser of two evils. It questions whether morality exists in an objective sense.And if it is in fact purely subjective and tied to time and place how excusable is breaking the code. The Doctor fears that guilt or discovery will ruin his life but feels the pressure to act to save his love is more pressing.
It was written in a time when abortion was illegal. Söderberg allows us to feel dislike and yet understanding towards the Doctor who refuses to perform abortions not because of a belief that it is morally wrong but rather that breaking the law could jeopardize his comfortable middle class life. The debate broadens into a brief discussion on eugenics which when it was written in 1905 was one of the main topics linked to and discussed with abortion - something that has not been true post World War Two.
It’s an easy read (in translation) and a bit like Ibsen in it’s exploration of norms and morality. Although it is almost impossible to empathize with Doctor Glass, the story is nonetheless a compelling read. And even thought it is sad and somewhat hopeless in it’s outlook - it is interesting historically for the issues it raises and explores.

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Week two of SFI passed uneventfully. It continues to be excellent although we can’t help but sit there letting about 70% of it wash over us as incompressible. It seems that usually someone or other understands what the teacher is saying and that manages to carry the class forward. It’s very interesting trying to learn a new language. I think I’m still in awe of myself trying and can’t quite believe I ever will. But nothing ventured, nothing gained…
Although it feels like a mountain to climb, it is an excellent excuse for reading kids books and last night I branched out into film and tried to watch Pippi Långstrump (Pippi Longstocking). Perhaps not surprisingly I could really only make out a couple of words!

It’s now turned icy cold here which is a relief after all that horrid rain. Braving the cold on Thursday night I took the ferry across to Lindholmen and met up with K and friends to watch Manufacturing Consent - a film all about Chomsky and seeing as it’s his 80th birthday coming up, we ate cake to celebrate. Although he is one of the leading intellectuals of the day and certainly has some of the best politics, I don’t think there is much in the way of films about him. I think this one is a good attempt to introduce people to ‘Chomsky the political activist’. Chomsky himself if somewhat ambivalent about the film, in part because he feels the medium of film is prone to heroizing. He says he regularly receives letters asking how people can ‘join his movement’, which is of course frustrating when he is just one person in a whole diverse sea of people working towards a better world. I think the fact that he is a professor at MIT, articulate, white and male gives him a certain credibility to begin with but also he is extremely hardworking and in the public eye and that in itself is going to lead to a certain amount of admiration. So while he isn’t the figurehead of any movement he is certainly able to analysis, collate and present evidence that is used to support anarchist interpretations of theories of power, propaganda and control - which is something that makes anyone read his work feel less isolated in their own interpretation of the world and more empowered to try and change it for the better.

On Friday after work I met up with Karin at Botaniska and walked around the wooded laked area behind it. It was cold but beautiful and the pearly white deposits of frozen water sparkled on the trees and the heather and the frozen ice shapes on the lakes and puddles made the world seem calmer and stiller. There was hardly anyone there and we spent a couple of hours wandering around and stiffening up in the cold before coming back to the flat for a well earned fika.

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What a week - the rain seems to have been nonstop and I’ve spent very damp mornings in my SFI classes. I’ve also spent an unhappy amount of time on trams and buses after getting a puncture mid week. Despite classes starting at 8am I have spent a very happy week at SFI learning Swedish - but it’s early days still and I’m still trotting out the sentence: ‘jag förstår inte svenska’ (I don’t understand Swedish) whenever I have to talk somewhere that isn’t class.

I’ve been spending the rest of the time meeting up with Karin and Cheri and of course going to the bookclub where we discussed The Sea by John Banville at length (well in between the cups of tea and life stories!). There really is nothing like sitting in a warm room with a cup of tea and a whole bunch of woman.

On Wednesday night I went to see When We Dead Awaken by Ibsen at the Pustervik Theatre in Järntorget which I thought was very well done. I hadn’t seen that Ibsen play before so it was great to stuff it into my mind along with his others and where better to see it than in a Nordic country in the depths of a rainy November.

Today I introduced Jin Sook from my SFI class to the delights of the Stadsbibliotek (City Library) and she treated me to lunch in the lovely little restaurant opposite where for about 79ske (£6.60) you get a very hearty lunch. I finished off today by going to the Arbetsförmedling (unemployment office) to see if they could help me to find a job. I’m not sure they can but still it was probably worth a try. They suggested that I come back when I have learnt Swedish and in the meantime contact my embassy to ask what companies there were here that employ English speakers!

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I woke up early very excited because today was the very first day of my Swedish lessons with SFI. I bundled myself up protectively against the cold and wet only to get half way down the hill and fall off my bike. Soaking wet and very shaken I had to limp home to get changed and start the journey all over again. Eventually I got to class, very late but happily in time for fika with kanelbullar!

All my studying has paid off so far and there wasn’t much I didn’t understand. The teacher is very kind and speaks slowly. The class seems very nice, altogether we will have three teachers so I guess that will help us with not becoming dependent on one teacher’s accent. And there is an interesting mix of students from all over the world. It was really nice to be sitting cozily in a classroom again and chanting after the teacher - it was happily reminiscent of primary school.

So now I will try to write some of this in Swedish as well! Bear with me as it’s probably going to be hideously wrong!!

Idag jag ha mitt första Svenska lärdom med SFI och det var bra. Alla mitt studiera hjälpa och det jag förstå mycket. Läraren är mycket vänlig och talar långsamt.

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Yesterday I went to spend my alloted 20 minutes talking to the person in charge of my SFI course. It was quite good getting some time to talk to a teacher and ask questions. The work experience I get to do after a few months consists of two full days a week at a place of work - it’s unpaid but does provide you with a reference as well as experience.
I then met up with Cheri and spent a very pleasant day wandering around town, eating nachos and drinking coffee in the city museum.

Today despite the rain I met up with Karin and wandered up through the Botanical Gardens to the wonderful wooded area behind. It’s great for walking and consists of a lake, woods and heather covered heath. The colours were all muted greens, oranges and purples and the mist hung on the hills: making the walk have a sort of refreshing autumnal beauty about it. After the drizzle drenched us we went and sat in the steamy warmth of the greenhouses in the Gardens and munched our picnic.

Yesterday it turns out was Gustav Adolfsdagen (Gustav Adolf’s day). I’m sorry I didn’t celebrate it - partly because he was the king that founded Gothenburg but more importantly because you get to eat a delicious looking cake!

I’m now snuggly tucked up at home watching the darkness descend through my rain smeared windows enjoying fika.

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I went to my first Swedish lesson today. If you’re in Sweden for long enough to get yourself a personal number then you can apply for Swedish lessons from the government. Known as SFI which stands for Svenska för invandrare (Swedish for immigrants), these are provided free of charge and are really quite intensive. There are two courses - C and D and everyone starts on C. Course C runs for three hours a day, five days a week for anything up to six or seven months and D anything up to four months. The first half of course C gets you up and talking and then during the second part of the course you get to do a sort of work experience called ‘pracktik’ so that you have the opportunity to speak Swedish in the work place.

I don’t actually start until next Monday but I’m looking forward (albeit apprehensively) to actually learning with other people. I hoping I’ve put down a good base with the time I’ve spent with Lingaphone (borrowed from the well stocked library here). I get to spend about 20 minutes talking with a teacher before the course starts on Monday so I expect I’ll find out lots more details then. At the moment I’m still a bit in shock that my course runs from 8am to 11.15 every day.

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It is now officially cold and I have even considered putting the heating on! On the 1st of November I noticed the first frost. Yesterday there was frost again but this time it lingered long into the day. Today there was ice. Yes real ice. I wandered down to Slottsskogen with the camera and there on the pond standing about, when they should have been swimming, was a whole collection of ducks and seagulls.

It is the most satisfying autumn ever - there is the most beautiful feast of colours - a real celebratory riot of reds and yellows to warm us through the onslaught of Cold Weather.

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I went on my first tipspromenad today. This is a typically Swedish thing that often happens on a Sunday morning. It’s a walk with quiz questions placed at intervals and really quite good fun. Karin and I caught the bus out to Partille and walked around the woods there attempting to answer questions. I enjoyed the benefit of one-to-one tuition as I tried to read the questions - it’s actually surprising how much you can guess from a few words!!

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For those of you interested in anti war events in Norwich then check out this list of upcoming events…

- Ammunition (reloaded), Art Show, 3rd-15th Nov., 11am-5pm
- Public Opening Night, Friday 7th Nov., from 6pm, Everyone welcome!

- Film Show: Occupation 101, Thursday, Nov 6th, 7.00pm, UEA Arts Room 01.02

- Remembrance of all victims of war, Sunday 9th Nov, 12.30pm, Peace Pillar

- Norfolk CAAT’s meeting, Monday, Nov. 17th, 7.30 pm, Birdcage Public House

- Vigil: 7th Anniversary of the ‘Liberation’ of Afghanistan, Thursday Nov
20th, 7:00pm, opposite the Forum

Meanwhile here in Sweden hot off the press, Bill Quigley (a human rights lawyer and law professor at Loyola University New Orleans) has been writing about Swedish anti war campaigners. Avrusta (Disarm in English) held a big non violent disarmament action at Eskilstuna and at Karlskoga on the 16th of October. Schnews were of course suitably impressed by the action. I get the impression that Avrusta are much like Trident Ploughshares who are known for their commitment to non violent disarmament actions.

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It’s All Helgona here in Sweden or All Hallows as it would be called in England - at least it was yesterday. Although we went on the Critical Mass last night I didn’t see anyone out on the street dressed up in silly costumes as you would in England. Although earlier in the day my friends showed me their carved pumpkin and costumes so I think the American traditions are taking over here too. Apparently this is the weekend that the Swedes honour their dead so often graveyards are lit up and people are visiting the graves.

It’s very cold here. Yesterday as we cycled round with our small but persistent band of cyclists our hands and feet were absolutely frozen and it took an ages to warm them up once we got home. There weren’t that many people out on the street although the bars and restaurants were aglow with people filling up to eat the weekly ‘after work’ buffets. The cars were super aggressive - whizzing past us as soon as they could, driving up on the pavement when they couldn’t. Not to mention the constant beeping and the one crazy guy who buffered a couple of bikes out of his way by getting his bumper up close to their bikes and shaving the metal off their mudguards with it. It’s very odd how the drivers are hardly inconvenienced by a Critical Mass at all - at worst it’s like a slow moving traffic jam for a couple of minutes, but as soon as a lot of drivers see cyclists they see red. There seems to be a genuine hatred there. Someone must have written about the psychology of drivers once they get into cars, because these metal boxes seem to be an amour for people. It’s quite shocking that so many people still use their cars in a city with such a good transport infrastructure.

Talking of which … big up to Ellie who now cycles the 7 miles to work and 7 miles back everyday - pretty impressive

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